I woke up this morning. Realized I have no idea when I work this weekend and freaked out a little. I work tomorrow from 9:45am to 10pm. I died a little inside when I saw that. I hate my job. I hate selling purses and wallets and more importantly I hate most of the people I work with. I am dreading working tomorrow and the next week and the next week. ugh. I need a better job and I’m trying to get one. I’m pretty sure I have another job basically. I think so at least. They just haven’t called me back yet. I really hate work. Kill me please.
Today was the start of the summer semester. I had to wake up at 7:45. Something I haven’t done since high school. It was dreadful. I haven’t been getting up until 2 in the afternoon lately because I’ve been up late with my boyfriend doing weird shit. I’m at school from 9 to 5 3 days a week… IN A ROW. And the fact that they aren’t academically ‘rigorous’ because they’re art classes doesn’t make them any less exhausting. In fact, that makes them more exhausting and frustrating because there is no right way to do art and there is no wrong way to do art and that just makes it a whole lot harder. It is also extremely expensive. Art school will destroy me.
I’m Maddie. I live in southern Illinois (not to far from the always fantastically dirty St. Louis). I go to community college about 10 miles from my home. I will graduate next spring and I have no idea what I want to do with my life except I know I want to make art and I know I want to be in Chicago. A small town girl’s usual dream, ha. So I guess I’ll tell you some things about myself starting now:
1.) I have brown hair and green eyes. I am 5’2 and I have big feet and too big boobs that just get in the way and throw all my proportions off. I wear glasses almost always because I can’t read signs very well. I like to wear skirts and body suits and pants. I do not, DO NOT like to wear shorts without tights. It just seems wrong to me. I also love my torn-to-shit vans and saddle shoes.
2.) I was an exchange student my junior year of high school which has made me quite arrogant and self conscious at the same time (I view myself as more likely to succeed than most people who I went to school with but I still am not happy with myself, etc.) I dropped out of high school because I felt as though it was a waste of my time and that I could be bettering myself elsewhere. And so I have.
3.) I have a boyfriend and a ferret. One’s name is Gabe. The other’s name is Milo. They both make me very happy and very frustrated at the same time but, they’re both perfect in every way. Milo is crawling around on the floor and being cute even though he attempted to chew up my palette knife… I forgive him.
4.) Last but not least, I am a hot mess almost 100% of the time. I want to go to school to do something but I don’t know what yet. I’m probably going to go to Chicago and work for a year or so before I even go to school and I will become an even bigger hot mess. I’m always late because I cannot ever seem to make it on time to ANYTHING. I take forever to do everything but, I still manage to pull everything I try off.
Keep checking up and I’ll be sure to entertain.